HOLY SHIT.
the last week ive had a horrible dreading feeling.
like im a boat on a lake that's gone still.
no wind.
no ripple to speak of.
nothing in the sails.

i cant ignore my heart, telling me that i am destined to achieve simply amazing, astonishing things in this lifetime, i only just dont know exactly how to arrive at these places, to get to these things.

its shitty and its all about me. i take full responsibility for not pursuing avenues, for just sinking into this hole.

i need a change, and a shift. and i know i can make it happen, if i just keep my eyes open for it.
theres so much going on in the world, and its all rushing past me, and at times, like right now, its unbearable, this feeling.

need to write some books;
need to make some documentaries;
need to live without the feeling im wasting it all.

things to do before i die:

start a whistler's symphony
make a documentary that changes the world
be in a band
build a house
shave my head
become a dancer
be a personal stylist
act
win the lottery
invent something
become knighted
learn to metalsmith
own a horse or two
become self-sufficient
help develop communities around the world
assist in a birth
be on the front lines of an important social movement
go to madagascar
take a boat trip to somewhere far away
scuba dive
write some novels, some screenplays, some short stories

it's true what they say; there really is somethin' for everyone.

when did people start smiling in photographs;
notice theres a trend in the ways people pose in front of cameras.
fascinating.

know what i think?
i think we take the sky for granted.

i just think we all think we are all so darn great.
that leaves no one to think that others are so great.
here's to thinking you and you and you and you are supremely great.